WASHINGTON, D.C. — U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) announced today that it is temporarily pausing its hotline for reporting undocumented immigrants, citing an “overwhelming influx” of calls about billionaire Elon Musk.
According to agency officials, a staggering 93% of recent tips involved concerned citizens claiming that eccentric billionaire Elon Musk, who was born in South-Africa, “doesn’t sound like he’s from here” and questioning whether his visa expired “somewhere between the Cybertruck delays.”
“We initially thought it was a glitch,” said an ICE spokesperson. “But then we realized people were just really committed to this. Some even provided ‘evidence,’ like clips of him struggling to say ‘San Francisco’ or the fact that he named his child something that looks like a CAPTCHA test.”
ICE confirmed that at least one caller claimed Musk must be deported because real Americans don’t buy social media platforms just to ruin them.
While the hotline remains on pause, ICE is urging Americans to focus their reports on actual violations of immigration law, not personal grudges against eccentric billionaires. However, an internal memo suggests the agency is bracing for a new flood of calls once the hotline reopens – this time, from Tesla shareholders demanding that Musk be relocated “anywhere but here.”
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