WASHINGTON, D.C. – Rumors from the White House report that the eccentric billionaire Elon Musk has reportedly hired U.S. President Donald Trump as the official babysitter for his young son, X Æ A-12.
According to sources close to the family, Musk made the decision after realizing that no ordinary nanny could handle the boundless energy and cryptic vocabulary of his child.
“I needed someone with experience in handling unpredictable situations, speaking in simple words, and knowing some great dance moves. Therefore Donald Trump was the obvious choice,” Musk stated in a tweet that has since gone viral.
Trump, never one to shy away from a new challenge, called the opportunity “the greatest babysitting gig in history, maybe ever,” and promised to make American childhood “great again.”
Trump reportedly arrived at the White House with a stack of his own children’s books (including The Art of the Crib Deal), and a strict no-nap policy. “This kid is a winner, folks, much smarter than Sleepy Joe,” Trump declared, before attempting to teach X Æ A-12 the fine art of making deals with stuffed animals.
While some have expressed concerns over Trump’s babysitting methods – including serving Happy Meals on silver platters and encouraging the child to “build a wall” out of Legos – Musk remains confident in his unconventional choice.
“Look, it’s a wild world out there,” Musk tweeted. “If my kid can survive a few weeks with Trump here in the White House, he can handle anything.”
Meanwhile, insiders claim Trump is already considering launching “Trump BabyCare,” a luxury babysitting service promising only the best, the most tremendous care for America’s future billionaires.
* Image: X.com/Mollyploofkins