CAMBRIDGE, MASSACHUSETTS – A coalition of pro-Palestinian students at Harvard University has announced a bold new protest tactic: boycotting oxygen.
Declaring that they “will no longer inhale the same air as Zionists,” the group has vowed to hold their breath until justice is served or until lunch break, whichever comes first.
“We realized that simply divesting from corporations wasn’t enough,” said sophomore Jasmine Al-Karim, holding a handmade sign reading ‘Air Apartheid Is Real.’
“Every breath we take is a silent endorsement of atmospheric colonialism. From now on, it’s no breathing, no peace,” Al-Karim added.
The protest has inspired a wave of solidarity across campus, with several students reportedly fainting in support. Harvard Health Services has issued a statement urging students to “consider more metaphorical forms of resistance,” and to “at least keep one nostril open for safety.”
In response, the Zionist Students’ Association released a press statement saying, “We respect their right to protest, and honestly, less competition for air during finals week is a win for everyone.”
* Image: Pixabay.com