THE ABOVE PICTURE MAY HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CONNECTION TO THE STORY (IMAGE: FLICKR.COM/TRUMP WHITE HOUSE ARCHIVED)
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a development that has left officials scratching their heads (and nervously checking their call logs), the White House switchboard has reportedly been overflown over the past week with an increasing number of calls requesting “cheap Russian prostitutes.”
The sudden spike in, shall we say, adult service inquiries has puzzled staffers, who insist they have no idea how the nation’s executive mansion ended up on anyone’s speed dial for such requests.
In response to the confusion, the White House Press Secretary assured reporters that the White House sees no connection between the increased number of incoming calls requiring “cheap Russians prostitutes”, and the Trump’s administration international policy satisfying whatsoever wishes by the Moscow Kremlin and fulfilling Russian president Putin’s every dream, specially related to the Russian ongoing aggression against Ukraine.
“We’ve handled some strange calls before, like UFO sightings, secret sandwich recipes, even a guy claiming he invented Wi-Fi, but this is a new one,” said one exasperated intern, requesting anonymity because they “don’t want this on [their] résumé.”
Meanwhile, Secret Service agents have reportedly started screening calls with the code phrase, “Sir, this is a government building.”